Raisin Bran Extra: No Son of Mine

That's what Raisin Bran Crunch should be saying of this abomination of a spin-off called Raisin Bran Extra. Okay, maybe that's being a little harsh; it's not THAT bad. But hey man, stakes is high when you're dealing in territory this close to the inimitable Raisin Bran Crunch. I'm sure I'm far from the first -- and certainly not the last -- RBC fan to grab Raisin Bran Extra off the shelf in anticipation of a dining experience somewhat akin to the joy of crunching and chewing your way through a bowl of RBC. But it's not just a cock-tease for RBC fans; with its cranberries pieces and yogust clusters, it does the same to fans of Basic Four, another one of the greatest cereals ever. Upon noticing said ingredients on the box, one might mumble quietly to oneself in the cereal aisle while pondering this week's choices: "Hm, a new cereal similar to Basic Four. I must give it a try at once!" (Because that's the sort of prim and proper voice we all have in our heads when shopping for cereal. At least those of us who like Basic Four.) But alas, dear reader, Raisin Bran Extra is no Basic Four, just at is no Raisin Bran Crunch. It is something else altogether, something ... less good.

There are two primary problems with this cereal. First and foremost is the crunch, or lack thereof. Instead of crunchy Raisin Bran Crunch flakes, this cereal has "crispy" Raisin Bran flakes. They're a cut above the relatively flaccid bran flakes in original Raisin Bran, but still don't make much of a statement. After a few minutes, they even turn a tad soggy. Paired with soft cranberries and soft yogurt clusters and soft raisins and relatively soft almond slices (all that stuff is what makes it "Extra"), the flakes really should be crispier. The result is, as they say, mildly "crispy," but that just doesn't cut it. The balance is all wrong.

Which leads us to the second fatal flaw: the mix of ingredients. On paper, it's super solid: cranberries, vanilla yogurt clusters, raisins, almond slices, "crispy" flakes. But something is lost in translation to the bowl; it just doesn't pan out. The magic is gone. The fire is out. Elvis has left the building. I bet if they lost the raisins (but then they'd have to call it Raisin-less Bran Extra!), added another type of nut, and made the flakes crispier, the cereal would be much improved. But I seriously doubt they'll do that for me, because I already alienated myself from all of the big-shot cereal execs reading my blog by ranking Joe's O's above Cheerios.

Anyway, this is a cereal I won't be buying again. I'll even go with original Raisin Bran over this. But most of all, I'll go with the oft-imitated-but-never-beaten Raisin Bran Crunch and Basic Four. And now I gotta run, because our rabbit is chewing on my jacket.